Third and fourth of the short story ...
3 .- Almost a hero.
Power is a wonderful thing, but the propaganda is better. It is not to criticize the Soviet propaganda, types and had their good thirty years to use and handled quite well but lacked three things: 1) A clear, 2) a real sense of what the masses want and 3) very, very imaginative.
were idealistic, of course, not criticize him, however things they were getting out of hand and needed a good image consultant.
And there I was, in Lublianka, keeping the kids happy and share a friendly with the guards. The case became famous, "the Argentine who is well with everyone," Pravda headline and Premier Khrushchev came to visit the prison followed. During these visits we discussed all issues amicably possible, just did not talk politics because, as I said, "I am not interested in politics, Mr. Premier, I am a communist" which made her laugh to Comrade Nikita, a simple farmer, playful, but capable of terrible wrath.
that day, my friend was more than worried, a man named Vladimir Semitchastny, commander of the secret police, as I said, conspired to put in place a figure that was more "understanding" with the old hawks the KGB. wanted to know if I had any idea.
- Any ideas, Nikita? - I answered yes, a few, but you will the banks?
- " What do you mean, comrade?
- have to make changes, hey, this is no more.
was startled and replied: "I am a Marxist consistent, not for me to destroy Mother Russia.
I liked when he spoke well, so vehement and more when you beat his fist on the desk, Nikita was a truly charismatic figure, an advertiser's dream.
- Look "I told him not asking you to change anything ...
- Best and he replied there are some young guys who insist to a policy of glasnost and perestroika to implement something called ...
- Why?
- Two Russian words with which, surely, you are not familiar, "he said glasnost and perestroika means transparency means economic restructuring ...
- sounds good, "I
- ; That says Miguel, a young agent of the KGB, he believes that if we open a little game we overcome the serious economic and social problems in Russia. I'm not so sure, paused a moment, evidently not sure how to express their doubts, Nikita was a flower type, was in fact the ordinary Russians, with a natural acumen and sometimes brutal, and sensed that something was not closing on Michael Young's proposal (after it was learned that Michael Gorbachev, someone in my own time was well known)
- ; 're right, "I said by way of this kid you are going to hell ... (I used another word, Argentina, untranslatable into Russian)
- So, Gustavo comrade?
had no idea, but it was the first time since my arrival they offered me a great opportunity and this, of course, excited me. In Lublianka had exhausted the possibilities of doing something important and I was bored, on the other hand, I was fond of the Russians, with their ways, so similar and so different from Argentina and I felt the need to give them a hand ...
- Look Niki-added-do a test.
was enthusiastic.
I asked him to identify a simple but important problem for people, something less, perhaps, but indicative of social mood. For my part, and some young workers (specifically including Miguel I included) would solve the issue and himself, and nobody else, I would judge my performance based on results of the campaign.
If everything was fine only asked to handle the advertising account of the USSR for about, say, seven years ... than she was one of the State's plans. I pointed out that the test does not lose anything, I could always go back to prison (bored and everything was better than the Gulag, where there was due to start from scratch) and that success would not be mine, but yours.
There was a final objection.
- Look, comrade I said after an awkward silence, you are a kind of outsider, of course not the ideal communist militant, but it is a typical capitalist, I, err, I did not have much contact with Argentines, but I think that if everyone is like you, are a different type of people ... neither socialist nor capitalist, but quite the opposite. If I have to be honest admiro su trabajo en la prisión, pero también creo que debería fusilarlo por ese mismo trabajo...
Me sonrojé.
- Creo que es usted un mentiroso nato, simpático, sí, pero mentiroso- agregó Nikita- y capaz de hacerle trampa al mismo diablo, como dicen en mi pueblo...
- Argentina We have a word for that, "replied proudly chanta ... Yes, comrade premier, I'm a chanter, but ask yourself if you should have a chanta like me at your service ...
got the job.
start with something as simple as the sauce and sausages Gosplan ... Everyone complained about them, they were the same across the Soviet Union, its flavor, its poor quality ... it was said that if sent astronauts to space satellites and why you could not do something decent with food in factories and schools. One day, one member my team brought some opinion polls had asked, but instead to reduce the answers to numerical indicators, I wanted to read them one by one, I hit the third I found: a woman in the Kursk area qualified to food of his works as "junk." The kids in the team, all good Communists who were born after the revolution and within, took offense to me, of course, that gave me an idea.
Simple, almost obvious, like all ideas once someone has had, but that nobody had been able to see before.
create, then the State Company for Fast Food to which I named as Uncle Josif (Uncle Joe) in an obvious allusion to Josif Stalin. We gave an attractive logo, the face of Stalin in red and black (which we take your old pictures that nobody wanted) and put a bit branches everywhere, I began an aggressive advocacy campaign, presenting it as new, the food space age (they were happy with it at the time) and, most importantly, an alternative to foods factory. It was, of course, the same menu, but presented differently, boxes of beautiful colors, some Soviet symbols, of course, get one free promotion, a generous supply of fries (Well, were turnips sometimes) and the inevitable sauce, yes, identical to that raised so many complaints. Locals flocked to just open and it was necessary to implement extra shifts, the employees were all under my control and my reading of the future combined with the suggestions of the boys on moral incentives, implemented the coveted title of "Employee of the Month", the which was later changed, the Russian taste for the "hero of the month" and he added the "red star for serving sizes" given at the end of the year. All linked to the state company had the same uniform, so I took another complaint, colorful and, I must say something ridiculous, but very, very, effective, university students who had left his career to serve in the premises of Uncle Josif (I had suggested Mc. Josif, but I think with good reason, rejected).
quality standards of the company were the same as the old companies, but presented in a new style, we were one big family, a team where everyone aportábamos the common effort and we were all over the Soviet territory. The client, Comrade we said, was always right ... except in those cases where we had, but this always added to the general rejoicing, "no should know. " In my free time I organized soccer teams, I aimed to implement more forcefully the sport in the USSR, to do a massive passion, forcing the media coordinators and positions to participate in them that Uncle Josif I also host the Festival Ballet Bolshoi that year, a practice that continues to today.
Finally, the fast-food campaign was a success and it almost cost us a single kopek since the investment was provided in the Gosplan.
A week after the cosmonauts from the Soyuz 1 appeared on television eating a "festive basket" Uncle Josif (which triggered our sales), a happy comrade Khrushchev came to my department of the Nevsky. Katia
was living with me and was proud of the visit of head of state, I put on my slippers and invited him to drink in the living room, was watching the football championship final: "Glory of the Motherland "a boring event, but I still wondered why ...
- Congratulations, comrade, "he began stretching out his hand.
- Thanks che-le-hope reciprocated the campaign has been to your liking.
- do my liking? - Started laughing and I could not help thinking, again, the charisma of this kind, oh yes, comrade, yes! During my visit to the United Nations around the world asking me about Uncle Josif, to the Yankees, a certain Roland, and Ronald, or so I wrote to ask me about data (I replied, but I knew that he was arrested for "anti-American" ), the Warsaw Pact boys want to have Uncle Josif in their countries ... from '45 were not so ... how was the word?, ah, yes, popular in Europe ...
- What they say in the Kremlin, Nikita?
- Oh , well, you know they are, comrade, "now his usual familiarity, there are suspicions and some believe ...
- think should depose him, Comrade Premier, he said, as always, Katia. The
not surprised - I want to turn since I took, my dear comrade. Whatever you do there are always unhappy ...
- Top In that spirit, che "said I, because we both started to get into that typical melancholy Russian only cured with a bottle of vodka we have them where we want.
- " How, Gustavo? - asked both
- ; Paste, Katia, Nikita, that's what to do ...
- What I then said the premier-a good purge, some trials add or a people's court ... might intervene militarily in Poland ...
- ¡No!- grité- ¡no sean brutos, cuernos!- bueno, usé la palabra argentina otra vez- Pero, che- los reconvine paternalmente- esas cosas no van más. Yo no sé, Nikita, vos sos un buen marxista y yo no leí más que el “Prólogo a la crítica a la economía política” cuando hice primer año en la Facu, y encima en el resumen de la amiga de un amigo, pero me parece que ustedes no entienden mucho de que va esto del comunismo, ¿verdad?
- Explain said something pissed the Premier and Secretary General of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union, no less than argento come not know where it intended to give classes on political theory ...!, but kept his composure.
At least until it ended up exposing my own version of seven-year plan. I looked furious and went, Katia did not speak to me for a whole week.
4 .- Dialectic applied or All power to the media!
Last week we met again in my department, Nikita did remove the guards and offered me, in his awkward style and sincere apologies.
- I thank- well-for what you did. At this time I would be in Novaya Zemlya, but for you, Gustavo.
- Oh , is nothing, "Katia's apology this morning was, of course, more effusive, just talked to some guys Pravda and I convinced them to hold you in power ... the other side we had some savings I could use Uncle Josif in a good cause ...
- " Bribing generals, Argentina?
- Miralo de este modo, Nikita- respondí- hice regalos de cumpleaños que tenía pendientes, prometí algunas cosas que, de todos modos, iba a cumplir porque era mi deber y asusté a algunos al cerrar locales en ciertos cuarteles...nada inusual. Sólo les di motivos para estar agradecidos conmigo y - lo miré a los ojos- con mi amigo el Premier...
- What now? - Asked, accept suggestions ...
- Well , Katia, Nikita, we must now act, hot. What we pursue is a revolution, but where do you start the revolution?
- Cuando coinciden las condiciones subjetivas con las objetivas, es decir cuando los cambios...- comenzó a recitar Katia.
- No cuándo, amor, sino dónde- y sin esperar respuesta añadí- aquí- golpeándome la cabeza con los nudillos.
- That, comrade, is a deviationism ...
- Me Katia so excited when you talk, really, but concentrate on the case; right? - Nikita looked at me astonished people have to be proud of the revolution, to feel part of herself, love her, excited her to continue with your Katia topic ... Look at the revolution is like God.
- What?
- Listen a little, Niki, do you want?, And tell me: what is the organization most complete, comprehensive and durable of all?
- No I know, I guess ...
- Religion, comrade, religion, churches and, in particular, Catholic Church. mind you, commit the greatest crimes, they send huge nonsense (again I used a argenta wordiness), cheat and use the faithful, change the essential points of their doctrine ... and continue as campers ... seriously, Nikita, priests are going to bury you ...
- We have taken steps in this regard ...
- No hear me, buddy, I'm not saying that the enemies are the priests, on the contrary, I put them as an example. Mystic, hey, that is the question ... mystical identification with a cause without knowing exactly what it is but convinced of his goodness ... You, the leaders of the Union Soviet must be as God sends good when good rain and also when sending the flood ...
stay a while thinking, I took the opportunity to strike while hot.
- We that make everyone want to live in the Soviet Union , we must introduce the world as they want us to be, not as we really are, but we can live up to the circumstances, patience, but at least they see us and say, "hey, that's good to be Soviet laburo all types have, everyone has a car, a house, There are no racial problems, or religious, have their flaws, of course, by then invade Hungary or overthrow the Iranian government, but who cares!, in everything they do is great. " That's what I have to think of us, and we have to start thinking about ourselves ...
- Well, comrade, Gustavo, is precisely what we are planning in the Bureau of Propaganda ...
- Bureau of Propaganda!, please Niki, do not make me laugh ... I had to deal with these guys. What happened, che, in twenty had good publicity, but after the war ...?
It was very fruitful meeting that ended, well, I do not count as we ended up with Katia, Nikita, Eliana and some came after Red Guards ...
was agreed that the Bureau continue working for a while and not let guys in the street and control, but me and a select team of Uncle Josif we can take care of a new office: the EntuRev or the Enthusiasm ; Revolution. With code-named Oktubre (I liked the Redonditos when, in the future, I was young) we operated outside official government channels and unrelated to the CPSU stagnant.
Coverage de Nikita Jrúshev era fundamental, así que mi primera tarea fue crear una imagen positiva de él afuera y adentro del país. No fue difícil, lo mostré tal como era, algo que a los rusos les encanta... creamos un par de revistas de chismes de los miembros de la Nomenklatura , el nombre popular del reducido grupo de personas que realmente dirigían la URSS , Miguel propuso actuar contra ellos, y otros pretendían negar su existencia, les dije que no a ambos, aceptamos su presencia, pero, en lugar de criticarlos, mostramos sus lujosas dachas sobre el Mar Negro y escribimos jugosos artículos sobre sus romances con miembros del equipo olímpico; las revistas se llamaron El Pueblo, con un sesgo más político, pero netamente oficialista y Rostros directamente dirigida a un público que se interesase por las vidas privadas y las residencias glamorosas. Fueron un éxito, hasta el punto que Pravda comenzó a operar contra nosotros, entonces nos dirigimos contra él, después de intentar cooptarlo claro, y creamos Hoja 24, un periódico de oposición que se hizo famoso por sus titulares irreverentes...
La segunda fase, dirigida por Miguel pero bajo mi estricta supervisión (el tipo era casi un genio, pero carecía de autoridad , todos se burlaban de él), consistía en la reforma política, ojo, yo no quería hacer alteraciones sustanciales, personalmente el liberalismo Socialism or indifferent I am Argentine publicist and remember?, but that the single party, the elections with few candidates, the Soviets were not going well, how to change everything was not the devil himself?. Miguel was a radical, wanted to open the game and the experience of sheet 24, a critic from the left, proposing all sorts of nonsense, I will accept them, of course, but it was my own game. As there was in the Argentina was relatively simple thing, my talent was unique, not so much come from the future but by the tricks he knew, and having no rivals (as well as my security, future and fun were insured) could devote my energies to work for the Soviet homeland. Development CPSU division into two great parties of the Communist Party and the Democratic Party, more conservative the first, the second most popular. Both agreed on the main points, especially in maintaining the socialist system and the Soviets, but everyone had full freedom to act as he wished in the remaining points, so the PC was based on the Nomenklatura in the Army and Fleet and department bureaucrats, while the PD brought together intellectuals, media jobs, the majority of industrial workers and important group of young people, the air force also sympathized with them. In the regional soviets was the difference, some republics were Communist and other Democratic strongholds, which was reflected in their delegates, an Uzbek, for instance, was usually Communist, while Kazakh democratic era, all Georgians who clung to Communism, XXV after the congress, claimed to Stalin. Also, Michael insisted on it, we encourage the emergence of minor parties, even a virulently pro-American, but I was the one who allocated the funds to them and assured me that will permanently remain a fool.
back policy Russia.
In the streets animatedly discussed and elections were followed with an enthusiasm not seen since the twenties. Nikita, of course, was the front, but we renew all middle managers and most annoying members of the nomenklatura. Katia, and Eliana, wanted me to present myself as a candidate, I told them to never commit this mistake and here I have kept my word instead Nikita persuaded to join the PD and I got that General Vladimir Semitchastny, back Siberia, is offered as PC candidate, both were friends of mine (to Vladimir I got him a couple of good friends, in addition to the reduction of penalties) and alternated in power for twenty years ...
In 1965, Niki dismantled the Warsaw Pact and established a peacekeeping force to face Socialist NATO, I almost did not speak about it but I designed a campaign in all media presented it as "the guard of Democracy ", by the time I coined the phrase" Free World "to refer to the socialist countries, a British publicist I initiated a complaint, but I had taken the precaution of registering the brand worldwide (the same way I did with communism, socialism, Marx, Marxism and a dozen more, not forgetting the sickle and the hammer, the red star and International) now to use some of those words or emblems must have permission from the USSR. That, of course, gave me an idea.
was 1967 and blowing winds of foliage in the Republic of Czechoslovakia, spoke of socialism with a human face (Sheet 24 had an excellent title that winter) and anticipating that next spring, in Prague, would be different.
Katia We talked, I had turned off the TV, definitely had to do something with the Soviet football, as she turned to me and asked, as restoring a conversación interrumpida:
- ¿Y los demás?
- What about that?
- The other socialist countries in the world, Poland, Romania, for example, are lagging behind ...
- Katia, we can not take care of everyone ... Which are fixed!
- You acting as a silver, and you know it-it hurt Gusti in his mouth, I must admit, I am concerned about the future of socialism sincerely ... There are multitudes of Poles who want to cross to the USSR and do not say anything about the East Germans, but that is not what worries me, finally after all are neighbors and are under our direct influence, but ... What about Chinese? Or of the Cubans? We can not lock ourselves in our borders, we need out there ...
- " Yes? - answered trying to give my words the accent neutral as possible, there in my own bed, just checking la efectividad de Oktubre.
- Claro, Gustavo, mi camarada argentino, somos la avanzada del Mundo Libre, somos el reaseguro de la democracia contra la dictadura fascista de los Estados Unidos; nuestro destino, un destino manifiesto si me permitís la expresión, es cuidar al mundo...
Aquello me excitaba, mi propia esposa comprobaba los éxitos de my work, the Soviets were proud of their country, while no longer repressed desires looked westward, however, felt able to seduce the world!, and felt that things should be!
- You have right, as always love, tomorrow we begin a new stage ... The USSR is just the beginning ...
Empezamos por el cine y la televisión, sin descuidar la radio y la prensa, pero ellas ya andaban solas. Me reuní con el Director de Filmes del Estado y le comuniqué que su departamento ahora reportaba directamente a Oktubre, no opuso resistencia y no tuve que despedirlo.
De inmediato empezamos a trabajar en tres proyectos claves: una serie de filmes sobre la vida de las familias soviéticas, debían hacerse en colores, con el formato más tradicional posible y de ellos la tercera parte serían comedias: colaboré personalmente en los guiones de varias de ellas, en casi todas el muchacho conoce a la chica y se enamora después de una serie de enredos, hay un par de personajes absurdos y casi tontos con los que el público no podía menos que encariñarse. Lo único que variaba en ellas era el decorado (el campo, el siglo XIX, el espacio exterior) y los nombres de los actores, desechamos, para este proyecto a los grandes actores nacionales y elegimos a desconocidos; los mudamos a una ciudad ucraniana llamada Chernobyl (el reactor, dije, deberían emplazarlo en otro lado) e hicimos de ella la sede de las industrias fílmicas soviéticas, en un barrio exclusivo vivían los actores y las actrices, a los que se les permitían, y festejaban con algunas cuidadosas notas de censura, todas sus extravagancias.
El otro proyecto consistió en una serie televisiva titulada "Heading to the Stars" located two hundred years into the future, with a crew veiled socialist, who explored the area on behalf of the Union Planet, whose operation is based on the Soviet constitution, most of the strength of ship, the Intrepid called, was Russian, but there was even a U.S. official, silly, that was the delight of the audience with his tics capitalists ... the captain, meanwhile, a gallant interplanetary and science officer, an alien cold and rational, they became favorites of the audience. Loved the series cosmonauts and popular interest fostered space missions, to the point that Semitchastny Premier announced that by 1975, sent a man to Mars (the Yankees and the project had failed lunar), which, really, was achieved in 1980.
My third idea was to create movies based on a secret agent; Oktobriana, elegant, somewhat cynical, highly sexual and always superbly groomed, was a spy in the service of the Kremlin as we would like it to be, not as they are in reality. Their secret gadgets, umbrellas explosives, helicopters, amphibious or personal cars, became an excellent product to include in the "holiday baskets" of Uncle Jósif...
Por esa época conocí al personaje histórico que, seguramente, hubiera elegido ver si alguien, antes de David Dezorzi, me hubiese propuesto viajar al pasado; Ernesto “Che” Guevara.
Lo había rescatado una misión especial en Bolivia y estaba reponiéndose en una clínica de Sebastopol. En sus visitas anteriores, deliberadamente, yo había evitado encontrarme con él, me daba cierto pudor y, además, no quería involucrarme demasiado en los asuntos de América Latina... sabía que, en ese mismo momento, un pibe, en la ciudad de Rosario, crecía ajeno a un futuro que, seguramente, no viviría nunca; I wanted to stay outside the life of that kid in Argentina.
I came to the door of his room and stopped, only had a few minutes, perhaps just in time to a single question, and wanted to use it well. I spent
.
- So that you're the Argentine who keep hearing about ...
- Yes, "replied modestly
- "Sos de Rosario, like me?
nodded.
- No I like what you do, or how you do it, buddy "His voice was mocking.
- I do my best for the Soviet Union, "I replied almost square.
- Dejate of bullshit, "he went maybe you think you're working with socialism, but to me che," I do not like as "say Martin Fierro.
spoke at length, finally, because two Argentine lejos de Argentina, siempre se entienden, me dolía, aún me duelen, sus dudas acerca de mi trabajo, pero en cuanto cambiamos de tema me sentí más a gusto de lo que lo había estado por mucho tiempo, más a gusto de lo que estaba desde que llegara a la URSS.
Por fin me animé y le hice la pregunta que toda mi vida había querido hacerle, la pregunta que todo argentino querría formularle al Che, la pregunta que nadie, a ciencia cierta, había podido responder en mi tiempo:
- Che, Ernesto what box are you? 
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